From my Journal

Browsing through my Oregon journal, I share with you two funny stories related to fund-raising and church collections........

Volunteerism is one of the major hobbies of American women, and today I was invited to give a blessing at the St Elizabeth’s Auxiliary “Thank You Brunch,” held at the Hospital, which acknowledged the many women and men who volunteer their time to help, visit, assist and monitor so many activities that are done in our area, especially in the Hospital and Nursing Homes. After my Invocation I shared with them a story about the group of 60 ladies killed in a car crash on their way to Las Vegas.......when they arrived at the Pearly Gates of Heaven, they found out that there was no room for them, and so St. Peter called Satan in hell, and this is how the conversation went....

“Hey buddy, I got an unexpected group of 60 ladies but I don’t have room for them right now. Do you mind if you take them up for a few weeks, until I make room for them?”

“No problem, Peter, send them down here,” responded every so cordially Satan.

So down to hell they went. But after a few hours there, Satan calls frantically St. Peter and cries out to him, “Please, Peter, take them back, quickly, take them back........”

“Why, what’s the problem, “St Peter asked mystified.

“Well, with all the Bazaars, Book Sales, Cake Sales, and so much fund-raising they have already organized here, they’re just about ready to air-condition hell!”

And speaking of Las Vegas, I heard another true story that I meant to include somewhere in these memoirs. It’s a funny story which is true. In Las Vegas there is a Catholic Church “Guardian Angel church” and the people who attend Mass on Sunday give their contribution in chips, not in regular paper or coin money. So they have a $5 chip, $10 chip $20 chip, $50 chip and I’m sure much more, all from different Casinos, Mirage, Caesar’s, Bellagio, etc. Then on Monday morning, one of the monks of that Church goes around all the casinos, and exchanges the chips for the corresponding equivalent of the money. And do you know what they call that Monk, who goes around changing chips? Of course, what else? The ChipMonk ! (Chipmunk)