Gossip – the triple filter

Socrates, the ancient Greek philosopher, was once stopped by a colleague who began a conversation saying “Do you know what I just heard about your friend?” Socrates interrupted the man to say, “At the risk of appearing rude, may I ask you to pass a small test. I call it the triple filter test.” Curious and inquisitive, the  colleague listened as Socrates explained the triple filter. “The first filter is truth. Have you made absolutely sure that what you are about to tell me is true?” When the man said “No, I just heard about it.” Socrates said “All right. So you don’t really know if it’s true or not. Let’s try the second filter, which is Goodness. Is what you are about to tell me about my friend something good?” Again, the man said “No, quite the opposite.” Socrates continued, “so you want to tell me something bad about him, but you’re not certain it’s true. You can still pass the test though because of the final filter, and it is the filter of usefulness. Is what you want to tell me about my friend going to be useful to me?” Once again, the man, probably embarrassed said, “No, not really.” Socrates concluded with this point, “Well, if what you want to tell me is neither true, nor good, nor even useful, why tell it to me at all?”

Another way to avoid gossip is to reflect on the THINK method. Ask yourself: is it True, is it Helpful, is it Important, is it Necessary, and is it Kind? If it’s any of these, then say it, but if not, don’t say it!